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This interview with Dr. Destruction was conducted by an MWF newsletter Surfin' For Scoops editor (also an MWF wrestler) the Big Kahuna on the eve of MWF Wrestlemania 1997. At the time, the MWF had just been 'invaded' by a subversive organization made up of former MWF wrestlers called the New World Alliance and the MWF superstars were rallying to meet the threat.
DoctorDMWF: Are we ready for
this God-damn interview or what, ya surfin' freak? I've been waiting here
on the beach for a 1/2 hour, ya lazy bum.
TPBKahuna: Sorry
dude. Hello ladies and gentlemen, it is I The Total Package Big Kahuna. I
am joined by MWF Hardcore Icon and Majority of Superiority leader Doctor
Destruction. How are you today, dude?
DoctorDMWF: I'm
Wonderful. Let's get on with this already, Jackass. I don't have all day.
I am a very busy man.
TPBKahuna: Easy,
dude, don't mess with me on my beach.
What is the philosophy of the Majority of Superiority?
DoctorDMWF: Hey,
an intelligent question. Are you sure you're the Big Kahuna? ANYWAY....I
was extremely dismayed that the NWA...a group composed of second-rate MWF
superstars...just blazed into the MWF and started throwing their weight around.
They jumped on the NWO bandwagon from WCW and instantly started getting top
matches in the MWF. The MAJORITY OF SUPERIORITY is a group of like-minded
individuals who are committed to wrestling entertainment excellence. The
top athletes of a federation should be
DoctorDMWF: on
top, not some punks that put on a black t-shirt and brag how great they are
DoctorDMWF: .
TPBKahuna: I might
agree with you there, dude, believe it or not!
So since you brought up the subject of the New World Alliance, what do you
think of them? Are they the threat they like to think they are, or just a
bunch of thugs?
DoctorDMWF: They
very well could be. But ANYBODY could form their own little 'protection'
group and dominate. And it's a crying shame, too, since I believe as individual
athletes, they are great! But forming their own little sewing circle and
preaching MWF Sucks and their take-over schemes is total BULLSH*T. And I
won't REST until they're destroyed. I believe it IS WAR.
TPBKahuna: One
such member of the NWA is former MWF champ Brother Fiend. He got involved
in your first round King of the Ring match-up versus Bobo Bravado and, arguably,
cost you that match. Your feelings on Brother Fiend and your upcoming
Lumberjack-Strap match at Wrestlemania.
DoctorDMWF: He
did show his ugly mug during that match, but I was the shithead that let
myself get distracted and eventually pinned. The NWA won that round, I can
admit it, but they're NOT going to win the war if I have anything to say
about it. As far as my match with Brother Fiend at WM goes.....I can't take
anything away from him. Since I personally worship squared circle carnage
and destruction, Brother Fiend has always been the man that can take me to
the limit of my pain threshold. MWF, NWA,
DoctorDMWF:
whatever Brother Fiend represents, Doctor Destruction will always
welcome a chance to lock up with him and take the MWF to new heights of
devastation.
TPBKahuna: Is the
MWF in trouble, Doc?
DoctorDMWF: Is
the MWF in trouble? That's a tough question. It's all up to the MWF athletes.
So far, we've been fighting the NWA one-on-three, and we're getting our heads
handed to us. I am slowly coming to realize myself that I might need help.
No matter how much I kick the shit out of any of 'em, they seem to have my
number.
**(At this point in the interview, Doctor D got tired of the stares of several
young men. He promptly beat the crap out of both of them and returned to
the interview)**
TPBKahuna: Onto
another subject, then. As you well know, Surfin' For Scoops is the recognized
symbol of excellence in sports journalism. If there's a rumor to be got,
the Big Kahuna will get it. I heard a disturbing rumor recently about yourself
and your brother, Mike Speedo. The two of you dudes are former MWF World
Tag Team Champs together, but I hear there have been problems outside of
the ring. Any truth to these rumors, and what might those problems be?
DoctorDMWF: You
blow your own horn, pretty well, 'total package', it makes me wonder how
many other things you blow well. As to my relationship with my brother, MWF
Champion Mike Speedo....I feel he may be letting the world title go to his
head. I was very disheartened to learn that after he won the title that he
must miss several weeks due to injuries sustained while winning it. So far,
he has returned and defeated the cagey Reverend Ralph Right in good fashion,
and eeked out a win over the Mountain Of
DoctorDMWF: Molten
Lust, both at King Of The Ring. But so far, that has been less than spectacular.
I believe if I receive a title shot against him, I would bring out the true
fire in him. He has heard of my desires, and seems to not know what to make
of it, making it quite uncomfortable around the dinner table. But if given
the shot, I would take Mike Speedo to places he's never been before.
TPBKahuna:
Fascinating. I half expected a denial of any troubles, but once
again the Big Kahuna's sources are proven correct!!!!
It's time now for a little word association. I'll say a name or phrase, and
you respond in a sentance or less the first thing that comes to your head.
Ready, Doc?
DoctorDMWF: I am
ready. I am always ready.
TPBKahuna: Rugged
Ralph.
DoctorDMWF: A Snake.
Although despite the NWA, a fine champion.
TPBKahuna: The
Mountain of Molten Lust.
DoctorDMWF: An
MWF veteran coming into his own.
TPBKahuna: The
Franchise Brett Krueger.
DoctorDMWF: A desperate
man struggling to remain on top. Managers, bodyguards, crying. Not this doctor's
prescription for a Franchise.
TPBKahuna: The
World Title.
DoctorDMWF: The
holy grail. The goal of any MWF athlete.
TPBKahuna: Brother
Fiend.
DoctorDMWF: Brother
in Pain.
TPBKahuna:
Wrestlemania.
DoctorDMWF: The
biggest MWF pay-per-view of the year. Doctor Destruction will pull out all
the stops on this one, daddy.
TPBKahuna: Well,
Doc, those waves are calling me!! Thanks for your time. Any last words to
the fans of the MWF?
DoctorDMWF: Nope.
They pay. I deliver. They know my commitment to them.
DoctorDMWF: Good
day.
TPBKahuna: Bitchin'
interview, dude! Care to join me for some surfin'?
DoctorDMWF:
Actually, I want to DO something with my day. Consider yourself
lucky my agent got you this interview slot. BYE.
TPBKahuna: Thanks
dude!
More about Dr. Destruction :
Dr. Destruction Career
Profile
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